editor's note

cut to: the office of an editor. so there are like bookcases lining the back wall and on the desk there are a bunch of books and manuscripts and a computer and a stapler and maybe like a picture of the editor's wife and/or mistress. maybe a picture of his wife and mistress together. but that's not important. truelance scholastic sits behind the desk. he looks like an editor. he is looking directly into the camera.

truelance: my name is truelance scholastic.

the name truelance scholastic appears at the bottom of the frame.

interviewer (who isn't seen): and what do you do for a living, mr. scholastic?
truelance: i am a book editor.
interviewer: and did you edit and publish bunnicula?
truelance: yes.
interviewer: how did you come across such a fascinating manuscript?
truelance: a dog brought it to me. he also brought me this letter.

truelance holds up the letter then pulls his reading glasses out of his front shirt pocket. he clears his voice and begins reading the letter.

truelance: gentleman, the enclosed story is true. i changed the names of the family involved to protect their identities. but, in all other respects, everything you read is factual. let me introduce myself. my name is harold. i come to writing purely by chance. my full-time occupation is dog. i live with mr and mrs x and their two sons. also sharing the home is a cat named chester i am pleased to call my friend. we are a typical american family. i hope you find this tale of sufficient interest to yourself and your readers to warrant its publication

interviewer: so a dog wrote this book?
truelance: yes. a dog names harold x.